How to Become a More Effective Positive Influence Leader and Inspire Change in Others

Unedited Transcript

Jim Rembach (00:00):

Okay, fast leader Legion today. I’m excited because we have somebody on the show today who I know is going to bring a smile on your face, uh, because yeah, he really focuses in on positivity, positivity at work and at home. So get ready to laugh. Glenn Parker, the only child of two hard-working parents grew up on the New York city streets. He played street games like stickball punch ball, three box baseball and Johnny on the pony with his buddies. He loved the competitive aspects of sports and opportunities that provided for leadership. As he got older and taller, he moved on to competitive school yards and recreational league basketball in high school. And later in college, Glenn played varsity sports where he learned the values of hard work, practice and collaboration. The sum total of these experiences helped clin learn that he succeeded when he worked hard, whether in sports or in the classroom, he took those values into his work life.

Jim Rembach (00:57):

And after working for several organizations, Glenn and a colleague started a small business as training and organizational development consultants. The company took Glenn to all parts of the U S allowing him to work with a diverse group of people working in a wide variety of industries and occupations. During this time he narrowed the consulting focus to building effective teams and creating team-based organizations. His clients have included pharmaceutical companies, such as Novartis, Merck, J and J Abbott and BMS telecom giants, such as at and T loosen bell labs and Pacific bell and industrials such as 3m, Kimberly Clark, Clark Pratt, and Whitney and BOC gasses, a variety of healthcare providers, retailers, and government agencies, such as the EPA, the NIH and the us coast guard Glenn always loved to write in his first article was published while he was still in graduate school, but it took a while for him to work up the courage and confidence to write a book with the encouragement of Peter bought block.

Jim Rembach (01:56):

Uh, Josie bass published his first book team players and teams in 1990, and then went on to be a bestseller. The book included a self assessment survey, which was subsequently published as a separate booklet and went on to sell more than 1 million copies as the Parker team player survey, many books and liter guys followed, including another bestseller cross-functional teams, working with allies, enemies and other strangers, and his most recent book co-authored with his son, Michael, his positive influence, the leader who helps people become their best self outside of work. Glenn has always been on the front lines of political and social causes as well as charitable issues, such as cancer. He has a cancer survivor and a long-time volunteer with the American cancer society. And he co-founded run for dad and annual event that draws some 1500 people. And it is designed to raise awareness about the dangers of prostate cancer and funds for cancer research, Glen and his wife, Judy live in central New Jersey, and they are parents of three grown and grandparents to six wonderful grandchildren, all of whom live nearby, Judy and Glenn share of gluten, Judy and Glenn share of love of tra the love of travel and having visited numerous places around the world to enjoy art culture, history and good food.

Jim Rembach (03:18):

Glenn Parker, are you ready to help us get over the hump?

Glenn Parker (03:21):

I’m ready. Let’s do it to be here. Yeah.

Jim Rembach (03:25):

Thank you very much. Now I’ve given my Legion a little bit about you, but can you please share with us how, what you’re going to share today is going to improve the customer experience?

Glenn Parker (03:36):

Well, um, let me, let me say that there’s two things that we, we want to, we wanted to get out of this whole experience, which is how do you first become a more effective, positive influence leader? What can you do to be a positive influence leader, how to be more effective as a positive influence leader. And I think this is, you know, maybe equally important, which is how to develop and train other people to be positive influence leaders in your organization. So a big focus of this is the training and development of positive influence leaders for the future. And that’s what we’re going to, we’re going to talk about. And that’s obviously, what’s also in the book as well, because I’m a practitioner. My son is a practitioner we think and write for other practitioners in organization.

Jim Rembach (04:33):

Well, and so the, the thing is, it’s true. Look at this from a translator or related connection to property. And because a lot of people talk about culture, they talk about employee engagement, creates customer engagement, you know, so you talk about, you know, how this work actually makes an impact. So I think it’s important for some to kind of really get their head, their heads and hands around. What are we talking about when we do this work? W what, what is, what is that result?

Glenn Parker (05:04):

Yeah. Well, let, let me answer the question in a way that we also answered in the book and with the research that we did, we interviewed some 50 people across a wide variety of industries and occupations from corporate people to doctors and nurses and healthcare, and, uh, and so on. And one of the things that we did is, and I think one of the people, what people appreciate very much about the book is the stories that aluminate, uh, the conclusions that we, we came to. And I want to tell you my story, because, uh, I had a, uh, very early in my life. I was fortunate to have someone who was a positive influence leader. So let me take you back a ways back, because my first job out of graduate school, my first boss, my first performance appraisal. So I had prepared for this and I’m meeting with my boss, Larry, and it’s going well, and he’s thinks I’ve done a good job.

Glenn Parker (06:09):

And I have to say, just paranthetically my job. Pretty much involved doing research and writing reports kind of boring. Okay. But I was good at it. I was very good at it. We get to that point in the performance appraisal that says your development plan. So Larry says, well, what do you want to do? And, you know, I had looked around and I th th the people across the hall in leadership development and leadership training seem to be having all the fun. They were traveling all over, uh, and they were conducting leadership classes and they would come back with stories of things that happened in class. And, and of course, travel stories that, uh, you know, they all had, and I would say, wow, that looks really interesting. So I said to Larry, I liked, I think I might like that, but I don’t know. I, what I’d like to do is to be able to observe a class. So he said to me, gee, that’s interesting Glenn, because I’m actually traveling down South next week to do a workshops in two different cities. Um, so why don’t you come with me? Um, he said, the thing is, I really can’t justify your travel expenses unless you teach something.

Glenn Parker (07:33):

So at that point, my lips start to quiver. And I, Larry, I, I don’t know anything. How can I teach something? He said, don’t worry, we’ll figure it out. And he did. And I did, and I taught two hours and the afternoon of the second day, and it went very well. And I said, Hmm, I like this. I think I can do this. I like kind of standing up and, you know, telling people what I know and helping them learn. And, um, so I can, that was my first sort of moment. And Larry was the first positive influence leader in my life. He positioned me for success. He, Tim, what, he, he saw something in me that I didn’t see in myself. I didn’t know that I could do it. In fact, I, if you asked me yes or no gun to my head, I would have said no, but he saw something that I didn’t see.

Glenn Parker (08:34):

Um, and the other thing is that was very important in terms of leadership, is that he didn’t say to me, I’m going down South, it’s a two day workshop. What, why don’t you teach the two days, I’ll sit in the back and evaluate, you know, he gave me a very controlled piece of the program to do that. He felt that I could do and do well. And that’s what we call sort of positioning you for success. I don’t throw you out there in the deep end initially, that, so that was kind of my first experience with it. And of course, I didn’t recognize what Larry had done at the time. I wish I could say that, but I didn’t. And, uh, but it was what it did is it changed the direction of my life and my career. I realized this is really, this was my true North. This is what I really wanted to do. And so many people have had similar experiences. They just didn’t process it at the time. So it makes it

Jim Rembach (09:35):

Well. Absolutely it does. And I think when, when you start looking at the, um, let’s just say the word, the, where we are today with the workforce, where we are today with, you know, the, the, the types of work that has to be done with currently being done is, you know, there, there are several things associated with how we get to the point to where we engage in impact and develop. And there’s a very big difference between training, mentoring, coaching. I mean, those are very, very different roles and we don’t, we don’t understand those it’s kind of foreign to us, you know? And so one of the things that struck me in the, in the first chapter of the book, which is titled you didn’t build that alone. I was really struck by the fact, then I started thinking that I would dare to say that a large, uh, number of people, uh, in the workplace probably never had a relationship, a very strong, deep relationship with someone who they could call a coach, a leader, a mentor, they may have to trainers, but that’s not the same thing. I mean, so when you start looking at people becoming successful in not having these roles, I think most of them don’t have those type of people. Would that be a correct assumption?

Glenn Parker (10:46):

Yes. I think it’s a correct assumption that, you know, if you talk about someone who is a, a coach or you’re a, the manager of your department, I think that’s probably the case, but it doesn’t have to be that way. A person can be a positive influence and be a colleague. Somebody who’s appear in the organization. It can be a friend. It can be in many cases. And this is what our research found is that it’s often apparent where the first positive influence in many people’s lives is a parent. And that gets people off to a very, very positive, um, start in the world when they have a parent that is a positive influence on them. And then maybe they discover someone in school, a teacher who doesn’t see themselves as a formal coach or a mentor, but they’re a teacher and they are, they’re inspirational, you know, they’re, they’re motivational. Um, or, and then you get to the workplace and you discover, you know, some, you know, your first boss, um, or maybe it’s your third or fourth boss. It may not be the first. You may not be that fortunate as I was. So, yes, but it can, these, these, uh, positive influence can come in a different form, very different form than the formal titles that we tend to associate with it. And that’s the cool thing about it, I think.

Jim Rembach (12:18):

Well, and what you say is absolutely true, and we do have those, oftentimes we don’t recognize those, but it seems like when you start looking at the pace of change, but influences that we have, uh, are, that are out there, the shifts and changes in the economy and people now going from, well, you know, it just, uh, not too long ago, you know, having careers that were 20, 30 years now, they’ll careers being two years, three years, two years, three years, four years, one and a half. I mean, it’s, it’s all these little, you know, many things, right. I have to be more intentional about finding influences and structuring and having some consistency, Don,

Glenn Parker (12:56):

To find somebody who is a positive. Yes. Right. And right. So say more about that. Let me break that down

Jim Rembach (13:04):

That a little bit, I think because of that opportunity or because of the conditions and the systems that we’re working in now, and when I say systems, meaning that it’s not the 30 year careers, right. Um, that we have to be more intentional and seek out those relationships so that it’s consistent. And so that we’re continuing to move forward. Otherwise, you know, we just spiral. And so, like, for example, when you start looking at the numbers associated with people who are C are seeking out, you know, mental health, um, support, when it, with all this COVID stuff hit. Now, I would dare to say that if we were more intentional and trying to find positive influences, being consistent, you know, with meeting and having those, knowing that, Hey, I have a gap here and I need to be intentional. As far as my development, we probably wouldn’t have seen as many people seeking help. That’s just a theory.

Glenn Parker (13:59):

Yeah. I, I think I, I, I believe that to be true is that, um, we, um, sometimes we, we realize we need someone to be a positive influence and we seek out that person. I have people, I have developed a network of people, you know, over the course of my life that I go to, I used to call them sanity checks. Okay. Uh, Jim, this is what I’m thinking right now. Does that make sense? Uh, and so I have people like that, um, uh, in my life and unfortunately, but I have, it’s been intentional on my part that as I’ve worked with people all around, I’ve said, okay, I feel like this is the person I want to continue the relationship with. Um, and so I think that’s a good point. And I think people need to be more of that rather than, uh, trying to tough it out alone.

Glenn Parker (15:00):

You know, I’m a big believer in, you know, uh, collaboration and, uh, working together. And I love the idea of bouncing ideas off of other people. This is one of the joys of writing the book, this book with my son is that he has a very different experience than mine. He’s worked his entire career in financial services, you know, and he’s, he’s led a number of groups. And so he, I will bounce an idea off him. I bounced the idea for this book off of him. And, you know, he said, yeah, I’d read that book. And that meant a lot to me because I know his practical experience and I respect it a lot. He’s also very up on the literature, so he knows what’s out there. And he said, yeah, I have, I haven’t seen anything like this. So yeah, I I’d love that kind of stuff. Um, and, um, and I seek it out and I’ve benefited from it and I value those people and I thank them regularly.

Jim Rembach (16:04):

Well, and I think that’s really a really important message here is that for all of us, we need to make sure that those voids first are recognized and that we’re filling them intentionally. If we’re not working for an employer, that’s helping to supply that, you know, whether it’s we take the, the religious path and we have a, you know, a pastor or a minister or a, you know, a priest or a rabbi or whatever, you know, whatever, um, you know, w we have to make sure that those are in place, whether they’re family or whether, and I would dare to say, don’t do family. Cause a lot of times they’re not going to share things with you and be, um, or they’re going to be more mindful and maybe more worrisome about hurting feelings and stuff. So maybe it shouldn’t be family, but then maybe you have, um, you know, some other stories to that. And so on everybody to kind of understand the inquiry is the way you break this down in the book is really important. So when you’re like, well, who do I need? Right. Um, so you talk about four positive types of influential, uh, influence leaders and supportive positive influence leader, the teacher, positive influence leader, the motivating positive influence leader, and then the role model, positive influence leader leader. How did you come up with these four?

Glenn Parker (17:15):

It’s a great question because we didn’t start out that way. And I, I think that’s, um, kind of the way we, you know, we, we did the research, we had an idea, a very, uh, high-level idea of coming up with a profile of a positive influence leader, because I had had, uh, an experience, um, that was the, you know, the Genesis for the book, someone who I was very close to was, uh, was a client of mine for 20 years, which is, you know, unusual to have a client for longer period of time, but it morphed into a friendship and the like, and he passed away and I got, uh, an invitation to a Memorial. And I began to think about how he, what he, how he had been a positive influence on me. Uh, you know, you think I, I was a consultant to him, but he had, he had, was a positive influence on me.

Glenn Parker (18:11):

He got me to do things that I had never done before. And maybe didn’t think that I could do it because he liked the work. I w he brought me in to be a team consultant and to create a team-based organization for him, which I did. And I thought, well, I’ll be done after two years. Uh, and at the end of that period, he said to me, uh, you know, I need, uh, my, you know, my organization needs, um, customer service training. You know, we have a lot of customer contact over the phone, and many of the people are people work in the field. I said, well, I’ve never really done customer service training. Uh, but you know, I probably, I can find one of my colleagues and, you know, bring him or her in here. He said, you’ll learn Jim. Uh, I, he, he said, you’ll, you’ll learn. Um,

Speaker 3 (19:07):

Yeah.

Glenn Parker (19:10):

And so, um, I did, and I learned, you know, but he wanted me to, because he knew, I, I knew his organization. I knew I would, he, I would tailor anything to, to, um, to, to his organization. That’s what he wanted. He didn’t want some off the shelf thing that, uh, had been created, um, elsewhere. Um, and there were several other experiences like that. And I began to realize, wow, that was powerful. I said, I can’t be the only person in the world has had someone like this in their life. And that’s what I went to Michael. And he said, yeah, that’s, let’s, let’s do that. So we started out looking for a profile, what are the characteristics of a positive influence leader? And we started asking people about their experiences. You know, you had a positive experience in your life and tell me what they did, you know, and how, how did they influence you in a light?

Glenn Parker (20:00):

And we started to get the answers. And we, uh, when we got finished, we looked at them and we said, these don’t fit into one bucket. They don’t fit into one bucket. And, and as a result, we said, we looked at this and we came up with somebody who we call. Eventually we called a supportive, positive influence leader. That’s the person that says you can do this, Jim. I know it. I can see it in you. Um, I can help you. I won’t do it for you, but, uh, I got your back. So that, that kind of supportive person, for example, a woman, we interviewed Jennifer, uh, she told us that her mother said to her early on, she said, Jennifer, don’t let anybody tell you that you can’t do something just because you’ve never done it. But

Speaker 4 (20:52):

For this process, that

Glenn Parker (20:55):

For a moment. Okay. Um, and also she just wanted to go to college and be a history major. And someone else said to her, well, what are you going to do with a history degree? You know what she did with a history degree, Jen, she’s now a senior curator at the Smithsonian museum of American

Speaker 4 (21:12):

History. That’s

Glenn Parker (21:14):

What she did with a history degree. And that’s what she did with the support from her mother. Uh, then there’s the teacher. Cause many people encountered people who taught them and they don’t necessarily all have the title of teacher or instructor or something or trainer. They might have some other, but they teach you what you need to know in order to be successful. Yes. It may be skills and experience. It may be, uh, knowledge and information that you need in order to do your job. But it also may be

Speaker 4 (21:47):

The here’s. Here’s how to it

Glenn Parker (21:50):

Understand the culture of this organization. You want to get something done.

Speaker 4 (21:56):

You, you want to work

Glenn Parker (21:57):

With another, that, that, you know, the, the client organization go talk to Jim. That’s the culture. Somebody is not, it’s not in the, in the policies and procedures manual, it’s in the culture about how things get done. They also teach

Speaker 4 (22:12):

The, the right way to do things that there’s

Glenn Parker (22:17):

Right way to do things in this world. And in this organization, um, it’s, you know, ethical standards and things along those lines. So the teacher sometimes they’re inspirational to teachers. Um, you know, for example, um, uh, Lindsey, a woman that we interviewed who was in fact, a, a school teacher, she went back to school to become a teacher. She’d had a career, you know, in business. And she went back, she wanted to become a teacher. She got inspired to do that. She came across professor Carlson, who taught her classroom techniques, but also she was so he was so charismatic, so inspiring that she ended up wanting to be a great teacher because of him. And she did. She ended up being a great teacher. She works in a New York city school system. And, you know, two years ago she was selected as one of the, I think it was, they picked 18 of the best teachers in the New York city school system.

Glenn Parker (23:20):

You know, how many teachers are other, probably 10,000 in the New York city school system. Then we found people that were motivational, like my first boss, Larry, that was the person who helps you find your true North, who you should be your purpose in life, what you should be doing. And they inspire you to get there. Finally, we haven’t talked about the role model. Some people are role models. Um, they look and they say, Oh, that’s how, that’s how you do it. That’s how you lead an organization. That’s how you be a, you know, a top engineer in this organization. Oh, okay. So they, they, they show you, they model the right way, the way to do something in an organization. Um, so most, very often role models are people you’ve met. You know, when they say, yeah, I w worked with someone who was my senior as an, as an ODI consultant.

Glenn Parker (24:22):

And I used to Marvel and watch him the key thing about this though, and this was the case for me, is that very often, you can’t completely emulate all of those things. You’ve got to take some of the things that they do well and integrate them with your style. Otherwise it feels, you know, just a phony, not real. For example, the most, one of the most famous role models in sports is Michael Jordan, North Carolina guy. And, and so, um, but many people will say the really ones who were thought, you know, that he was a role model for them. They, the smart ones didn’t try to emulate. They didn’t try to copy his jump shot. What they did is they emulated his work ethic. First person in the gym in the morning, last person to leave at night practice. The same thing over and over again, took take a thousand foul shots until you can get over 90% of them.

Glenn Parker (25:24):

Correct. That’s what, you know, sometimes people they’d have role models. I’ve never met, you know, role models. They say that actually never met. So those, we ended up with four styles and four types, and it’s sometimes you are one of those four and can be extremely effective. Sometimes you use a combo of two, sometimes three, sometimes four. What we say is the transformational leader is the one that’s able to encompass all four, utilize all four and be situational about it. This is building on, you know, Ken Blanchard, situational leadership that really effective leaders are situational. They look at the situation and they say, Oh, this is what I think you need right now. Uh, and I’m going to do it all right. So they, they, they have, uh, that have, uh, an extensive repertoire of responses. Does that make sense to you? Yeah. So that’s, um, so that’s kind of the four styles and how they sort of, uh, integrate and we can talk about how to make use of that practically in organizations.

Jim Rembach (26:38):

Well, I think that’s important is to, you know, okay. So I understand the framework, you know, I understand these particular areas. Um, for me, when, as I was going through a book, I started thinking, and you mentioned it about making sure that we’re, we’re helping, you know, um, whether you want to call them a coachee or a subordinate, or heck maybe even appear sometimes, uh, be able to recognize that you need these for, you know, for their developmental. And I’m like, well, gosh, as a leader, do I have to become these far and build the competencies in these areas? So, I mean, it can get kind of complex. So I think applying or application, how you go about doing that is really important to discuss.

Glenn Parker (27:20):

Yes. And, and that’s, you know, part of our role as, as practitioners helping other other practitioners. So we developed this, um, uh, positive influence leader survey, which, uh, in, in, in its first iteration is a self-assessment and you, you may have taken in many people who read the book, it’s in the back of the book, they, when they finish, they take this self-assessment, it gives you a reading on what your preference is, what is your most preferred style? Um, and so people will use that and say, okay, this is what, who I am. If I want to be a more well-rounded leader, maybe I want to bring in some of the strengths of those other two or three styles to be more well-rounded and then work toward being a transformational leader. Um, I will say that the survey is going to be published by our publisher HRD press as a separate booklet, to make it a lot easier to use in leadership development.

Glenn Parker (28:33):

And in team development sessions, there’ll be a second booklet, which will be the three 60 version of it. So I think everybody in the audio, your audience knows what three 60 is. You give it out to, you know, people who are peers or members of your team, people who report to you, uh, other people that you think will, will have relevant feedback for you. So you can compare your self-assessment with the assessment of, uh, of, uh, other people. And the third booklet will be a how to use this in leadership development, um, and training and development classes, and also in team building and how to develop effective teams. So this is where we get to, how do we use this inspiration to be, to improve the effectiveness of leaders and the effective organizations by creating more and better leaders.

Jim Rembach (29:31):

So, um, okay. Uh, and I think that is similar to many other systems to where it’s self discovery and understanding. And then you start looking at being able to grow, you know, and have impact from there and getting to the point where, you know, you call it being that situation or being that, uh, uh, transformational leader who can, you know, make a difference because I’ve built competencies and then therefore subsequent skills, you know, in all of those areas. And I, and I would even dare to say, well, so this, this starts getting into that whole issue that we were talking about a moment ago, though, how do we accomplish that one? I’ve got a bunch of free eight free agent workers. I have a lot of remote staff. They don’t work for me. I’ve got, you know, all of, all of this different type of, um, work environments, you know, hybrid and virtual. And I mean, I’ve got all of these, these different configurations, how do I prevent, or how do I get to the point to where my organization, I’m really starting to get some impact and, and the customer’s feeling it because I’m doing all this work. I mean, it seems to me like it’s going to be hard to apply and, and put it all together. So we gained momentum.

Glenn Parker (30:41):

Well, we’re going through this transition now where, uh, we have this, you know, that, uh, hybrid workplace, you know, where some people are working from home, some people are coming into the workplace. Some are doing a split between working some from home, working some in the office. We have been, haven’t completely played that out yet, but I think what we’re, you know, what has not gone away is the need for effective leadership, the effect, the need for effective leadership development. What, what you’re getting to is the delivery mechanism. How is it, how, how are we going to get there? And, you know, we’re, you know, so many of these staff meetings are done via zoom, but we’re going to have to learn. And we are learning now how to do development, using the technology of zoom and WebEx and Microsoft teams and all the ones that people are using now.

Glenn Parker (31:40):

And we will use that. Um, one of the things we did with some degree of deliberateness is, and you probably noticed this at the end of every chapter, we have Dolly, a little bit of a summary, but also some very, uh, strategic questions that reflect on that chapter that was done with, you know, a good deal of intention. And we’ve, I’ve already had at least one organization, a leader say to me, Glenn, this is what I’m doing. Now, everybody in, in, in my, my team is reading the book and what we’re doing, we’re taking it chapter by chapter each week, we discuss a D you know, the next chapter, and we use those four questions to learn and reflect or reflect on what was in that chapter and learn more how we can be more effective leaders. So they’re doing it, they’re using it. Um, and they’re using it remotely.

Glenn Parker (32:43):

What I, you know, I’m old school, Jim. I mean, I like face-to-face, I like to be with people. That’s, you know, that’s how I came up. That’s probably how you came up. And most of the people here are used to that. Um, but, uh, and we may get back to some of that. You know, we certainly hope that, you know, that that is the case, but, uh, we’re going to have to do, um, we’re going to have to do more of this remotely, just like we’re going to have to do the survey, fill it out on our own, you know, at our work, uh, our workstation, and then come together and discuss the results and, um, you know, learn from what we can from the results of the survey. So, yes. Um, it’s, it’s more the delivery rather than the, I would say the content that’s got it that is changing.

Jim Rembach (33:35):

Oh. And it’s not. And, and so, you know, figuring out your environment and where it works best for you is important. You’re just trying to help to support that. Okay. So, um, but I think when I think about, um, really the impacts that we have in, in our world, um, that are very negative in nature, and we do have all of these other, you know, humps and hurdles that we have to get over. Um, you know, I started thinking about, you know, timeline, transformation, you know, points to, to impact and effect. So what have you seen when people start moving towards something like this, them experiencing realize in regards to, you know, the internal change and then, you know, customer impact. I mean, how quick does that happen?

Glenn Parker (34:20):

So you’re talking about negative. How do people deal with negative experiences, right.

Jim Rembach (34:25):

To overcome all the different forces. I mean,

Glenn Parker (34:28):

There’s a lot of negativity out there and, and, you know, and, uh, and it certainly impacts people. And, um, that was part of the research, you know, we asked people, um, have you ever had a negative experience in your life? People, some person who brought negativity to the relationship, and I, I have to say this sadly is that, that was a much easier question for many people to answer than the positive one, uh, excuse me. Uh, but, um, um, so, you know, for example, you know, people told us stories, for example, um, one of the people we interviewed an African-American, uh, engineer and engineering manager told us about a story. When he was in high school, he was talking with a guidance counselor or career counselor, and he said, I’m going to, I want to go to college. And I want to, uh, do a double major in management and engineering. And she gave him the money

Speaker 4 (35:49):

Look like, like, really? And that was it. But th th this was

Glenn Parker (35:57):

Not a young man who remembered that experience from high school. So vividly Jim, that he was able to recall it with, you know, much more, uh, drama than I’ve done. I’ve done

Speaker 4 (36:10):

Here. So,

Glenn Parker (36:13):

You know, he went on to get his engineering degree. And again, as a double major in management, um, got out of school, went to work for GE, had a long career at, at GE, became an engineering manager and so on. And I said to him, did you ever go back to that guidance counselor, that career counselor and said,

Speaker 4 (36:37):

He said, no, didn’t have to. And I said to him,

Glenn Parker (36:43):

Um, I said, Jean, what do you think it was? Because you’re, African-American that she saw you that way? He said,

Speaker 4 (36:49):

No, she was just bad at her job. She was

Glenn Parker (36:52):

Just bad at her job. And so, um, then we had other stories like that. So what, what, one of the coping strategies that people develop that we learned is that, which was a, to use it as motive,

Speaker 4 (37:10):

Vacation to say, you know what,

Glenn Parker (37:13):

I’m going to, I’m going to prove her wrong that I can do this. And we had a number of example of that, you know, that sort of, yeah, I’ll prove you wrong. Another example was, you know, people, you know, you can’t always get rid of negative influences. You know, it could be a parent, it could be your boss. You can’t just suddenly walk out on your parents and declare your independence. You can’t something sometimes, you know, you can’t afford to quit a job. And so, so, but, but people do is that they, uh, they look and they learn and they take it all in and they remember it. So when they get their chance, you know, for I’m thinking of Mindy, a woman that we interviewed, and, uh, she said, talked about her first job. She worked in a women’s health clinic, and the boss was somebody who fostered conflict among the members of the team.

Glenn Parker (38:09):

She did not, if you, she did not listen to his people, suggestions, uh, she didn’t listen. She wasn’t open to ideas and new ways of doing things. So Mindy took it all in. She, you know, was an important job for her to learn. Cause she wanted to get into this whole area and eventually through some help with some other people, she opened a, um, a workshop for women who have been the subject of physical and mental abuse and sexual abuse. And she runs a firefighter program now. And what she said to me is I took that and said, [inaudible] when I get my turn, I’m not going to do it that way. I’m going to be open. I’m going to listen. I’m going to involve people. And there were a number of other, uh, examples. And also maybe I think we came up with five different coping strategies that people came up with to deal with negativity. And some of these stories, Jim, are, they break your heart, they just break your heart and say like, ha how did you get through this? It was really extraordinary stuff. I get very emotional when I hear, when I talk about some of those,

Jim Rembach (39:23):

Oh, I think that’s, as they say, that’s the human condition. We have to those examples, because we’re going to meet the same struggles. We need to know how to go about getting up and coping, like you were saying, okay, you talked about the book, you talked about the supplements you taught, you know, the assessment, you talk about all of those. Um, so when I, when I think about this, um, you know, there’s a lot of things that you’ve had from a positive influence perspective in order to keep you going. And one of the things that we like to do on the show is share quotes so that we can focus on, is there a quote or two that you like that you can share?

Glenn Parker (39:58):

Yeah. Um, there, there there’s one that goes way back to Rosabeth Moss, Kanter. She wrote a wonderful book called the change masters. And, um, she was at Harvard at the time. And the quote is, and it’s always, it’s been something that’s driven. You know, a lot of my experience, which is everything looks like a failure in the middle. Everything looks like a failure in the middle. And what she’s saying there is that, um, you know, it was everything, you know, a new project starts out with great enthusiasm and when it ends, and there’s a big celebration, but in the middle, there’s a lot of obstacles. And sometimes you feel like, I, I, you know, I can’t handle this. I am not going to be able to do it. But the people who are successful, the positive influence leaders of what, you know, what, um, professor Cantor called the change masters. They persevere, they persist. They keep at it. Um, they don’t give up. They have, what’s more modern terms. They, they, we, we call it now grit. You remember the, you know, the book by Angela Duckworth. Um, and I, I, that’s one of the things that, you know, that that’s that quote and the, the what’s behind it, it drives me

Jim Rembach (41:23):

Well. And I appreciate you continuing to have grit and move forward in the fast leader. Legion wishes you the very best. Now, before we move on, let’s get a quick word from our sponsor. And even better place to work is an easy solution that gives you a continuous diagnostic on employee engagement, along with integrated activities that will improve employee engagement and leadership skills in everyone using this award-winning solutions guaranteed to create motivated, productive, and loyal employees who have great work relationships with our colleagues and your customers to learn more about an even better place to work visit [inaudible] dot com forward slash better. Okay. Fast leader Legion. Here we go. It’s time for the home. Oh, okay. Glen, the hump day hoedown is the part of our show where you give us good insights fast. So I’m gonna ask you several questions and your job is to give us a robust and rapid responses are gonna help us with onward and upward, faster. Glenn, are you ready to down?

Glenn Parker (42:11):

Let’s go. Let’s do it. All right. I dunno if I can be brief. That’s not my strength, but I’ll do my best.

Jim Rembach (42:19):

Oh, it is holding you back from being an even better leader today.

Glenn Parker (42:22):

Overthinking. Yeah. Just I overthinking the thing, wanting to go over it and over it again. And, uh, yes, just overthinking. What is the best leadership advice you’ve ever received? Uh, persist, persevere, keep going. Yes, that’s it. Yeah.

Jim Rembach (42:44):

What is one tool that you believe helps you lead in business or life?

Glenn Parker (42:50):

Uh, I would say, uh, this whole idea of, uh, uh, I like this idea of grit, um, uh, the being resilient, pushing back, you know, overcoming obstacles. Um, yeah.

Jim Rembach (43:07):

And what would be one book you’d recommend to our Legion? It could be from any genre.

Glenn Parker (43:11):

Well, uh, can I do more than one police? Okay. So I would say, um, the, uh, any, anything by Ken Blanchard, you know, uh, any leadership in the one minute manager, uh, the visionary leader, um, by, um, by, uh, Warren Bennis, who is one of my heroes. Um, I would say the change masters and yes, I grew up, I I’ll go with those three.

Jim Rembach (43:43):

Okay, Pat. Okay. Fastly Legion. You can find links to that. And other bonus information from today’s show by going to fast leader.net and doing a search for Glenn Parker. Okay. Glenn, this is my last Humpty hoedown question. Imagine you’ve been given the opportunity to go back to the age of 25 knowledge and skills that you have now back with you, but you can’t take it all. You can only take one. So what skill or piece of knowledge would you take back with you and why?

Glenn Parker (44:07):

Well, I would S I, I, this is what I would do. I think I would look, I would look not. I think I know I would look for more opportunities to be a positive influence on other people. I think that’s one of the great things that we all can do is to help other people, um, and help in my case, help people be, get through situations and be a positive influence on them. I didn’t know it at the time. I think I could have done more. Um, and I, I, I’m trying to make up for that. Now,

Jim Rembach (44:41):

When I had fun with you today, can you please share with the fast leader Legion, how they can connect with you?

Glenn Parker (44:46):

Uh, you can, you know, there’s a, there’s a website for the book called it’s called it’s www of course dot the positive influence leader.com. The positive influence leader.com. May I say this? Um, I I’ve enjoyed this conversation very much. I must say Jim, this has been great. So I want to say is that, uh, uh, the first three people that contact me at that website, uh, who say I’ll buy a copy of positive influence on Amazon. And if they say they’re going to do that, I will, then I will send them a signed copy of the book. And then they in turn can give their copy to another person because, uh, positive influence leaders pay it forward. So you can email me@glennatthepositiveinfluenceleader.com. Of course, give me your mailing address so I can, I can send it to you. I have great powers, but I can’t necessarily conjure up your address. So, uh, Glenn, G L E N N, at the positive influence leader.com, the first three emails that I get, I will send you a signed copy of the book, assuming that you’ve, um, bought a copy of the book on Amazon. There you go.

Jim Rembach (46:15):

Glen Parker, thank you for sharing your knowledge and wisdom. The fast leader, Legion honors you, and thanks you for helping us get over the hump.